22 Jun 2025:  A message from Minkah's Mum

Yesterday, the universe took my heart and soul from me.

My steadfast, loyal, fierce protector. My best friend. My confidante. My Minkah.

She, the queen of our hearts. Fluffy toy disemboweller. Cheese and chicken nugget enthusiast. Bacon devourer. Doggy profanity professional. Tug-of-war champion. Pish destroyer.

My knight in furry armour.

Thank you for giving me 13 amazing years, my sweet girl. Thanks for all the laughs and beautiful memories. Thanks for choosing me to be your mother.

Say hi to your sister for me. Until we meet again, my little creature of darkness. I love you. ❤️

22 Jun 2025

Minkah continues her observations in "Minkah's Beyond Blog" below.

22 Mar 2025

I  indulged myself by eating my Birthday Cake on the weekend! Mum makes a great "Minkah Cake" - minced beef, minced turkey, diced lamb, diced beef, some veges, eggs, olive oil, all mixed together, with a layer of salmon (Tasmanian, please!) and finally topped with cottage cheese and grated cheddar! Delicious!

She is not such a bad Mum at times... thank you Mummy!

I must say, I don't feel any different to last year, but Mum has started calling me a new word - "teenager". I don't know what that means... 

5 Mar 2025

I am pleased to announce that today is my birthday. As a result, I declare this weekend to be The Queen's Birthday Weekend. I shall visit my alternate residence and the humans will present me with a special Minkah Royal Cake!

I am now officially a teenager! But sometimes the joints feel like I am a little older than that...

1 Mar 2025

I spent a few days at my alternative residence. Mum left me with the Residence Owner. When she returned she had moved our home. Again. I do wish she would stop doing that. However, the new wilderness is welcome, and on the positive side, I have a new neighbourhood to bully into submission.

31 Jan 2025

I have my own song! Minkah's Scheme! I approve!

30 Nov 2024

I was reading the article below. 

I now have another question for this Google person. "Where can I obtain training in the use of heavy equipment?"  There are a few labradors I would like to visit. Oh... and a screamy red dog.

20 Oct 2024

I heard Mum say that when she does not know something, she asks someone called Google.  My Mum knows almost everything, so this must be a rare event, and this Google must be a very knowledgeable person. I have a few questions for this Google myself:

1 Where does mummy go during the day? And can we stop her going?

2 Why can't I have treats all the time?

3 How can I get two dinners every day?

4 What was that red screamy dog?

19 Oct 2024

I have trained Mum to understand a new command!

When I get tired from playing, I pant a lot and then when she says "Chill!" I know she has gotten the message and we stop, as per my request.

27 Sep 2024

Mummy and I went to visit The Wilderness this weekend. It was lovely! Great day, lots of smelly things to investigate, sunny weather. I had a wonderful time.

I also met a strange fat black puppy! It stared at me, as if it thought I was the stranger! The gall...!

I asked it exactly who it thought it was and did it know who it was starting at!? Mummy told me to stop barking.

So I stared at it, with the occasional growl.  The cheeky fat-headed black puppy tried to growl back at me!Some mutual snuffling was done, as a show of standing our ground.  And then it wandered off.

I dunno what it was... Mum said something about some sort of bat, but I dunno what she was referring to. I've never heard of a game called "wom" and I am not sure that playing this game is related to the fat puppy. Humans can be weird.

But I can tell you this - that puppy needs to cut down on the treats...

18 Aug 2024

Mum left me at my Secondary Residence. I slept most of the day. Looking after Mama can be exhausting. Anyway, I awoke during the night and thought that a little exercise might be just what was required! I presented my favourite fish to the Residence Manager, who was in bed. He did not seem to fully appreciate the opportunity I had granted him...

21 Jul 2024

New wilderness has appeared at my second Royal residence!

I assessed it carefully and determined that it was suitable for aerial fish, so I instructed the Residence Manager to make my fish become aerial. I admit I got a little excited briefly, and did a rather large bounce from side to side!

10 Jul 2024

It has been drawn to my attention that I am free to choose my own name!

 Whilst humans may continue to call me Queen Minkah 1st, or Her Majesty, all other creatures will refer to me as Ryallu the Proud! Ruler of Everything the Light touches! Destroyer of any who Hide in Darkness! Eviscerator of Fluffy Toys!

6 Jul 2024

So, last night I was minding my Royal Business when I heard a suspicious noise from outside. I headed for the Royal Balcony to observe the street.  And what did I find?

There on the road was a strange looking dog - red coloured with short legs and pointy snout! I advised it to leave, lest my wrath be incurred. And do you know what? The Weird Red Dog screamed at me! Not a normal dog sound, for sure. I don't know what language it was speaking, but I know that it swore at me! So I let it know that it was not welcome and the Weird Red Screamy Dog more or less ignored me! I wanted to go down there and teach it a lesson but Mummy suggested that we should go back to bed. She said something about "4am" and then used some words I did not know. It sounded like "just a focks" or something. However, if that Weird Red Screamy Dog returns I will administer my judgement rapidly!

9 Jun 2024

Mummy and John and I were watching an old episode of The Twilight Zone - series 3 Episode 19 "The Hunt". It is about a dog and his man who die and go to Heaven but the Nasty Man at the gate will not let the dog take his human inside. So they refuse to enter! Very wise. But it turns out that the Nasty Man was trying to trick them! He was The Devil!! I knew there was something about him that was not right... There is an excerpt from the show here.  Mr Serling concludes by saying "Travelers to unknown regions would be well advised to take along the family dog. He could just save you from entering the wrong gate. At least, it happened that way once—in a mountainous area of the Twilight Zone." I believe humans also suffer from sexism. But I can assure you  that the family dog can be a SHE and SHE can also protect you from errors! Mr Serling is forgiven, and he may serve in the Opposable Thumbe Reserve.

25 Apr 2024

Mummy had to do some Mummy Business so I am resident at one of my Spare Royal Residences. The good news is that the Italian visitor was easily trained in the ways of aerial unicorns.  He presented a talk on his latest research last night, into why stars become red giants. I think he has made a mistake in the density calculation...

And the crazy thing... it seems he would rather play with his stupid Kippenhahn diagrams than throw my fish. I mean, really! And he has the density wrong anyway! Humans...good grief...

17 Mar 2024

So I woke Mummy at about 3am (human time) because of an urgent development. Mum is pretty good, and she realised this was important so she got out of bed. I took her to the kitchen and pointed out that my food bowl was empty, and that I was hungry. Humans communicate in weird ways, but it sounded like she said something about midnight snacks, and then she went back to bed! I may have to increase her training...

22 Feb 2024

Mummy and John weren't paying enough attention to me, so I invented the aerial dig. They filmed it and thought it was very funny... and they started to pay attention to me.

Sometimes a Queen has to be crafty!

26 Jan 2024

There has been some chatter recently about dogs watching television. I do not know what the lesser creatures do with their time. But personally, I am rather fond of Insiders on the ABC. A nice way to spend a Sunday morning. I also quite enjoy Masterchef. The English Masterchef, of course.

22 Jan 2024

I spent the last weekend at one of my Royal Residences. However, the beds there are too small. Mum almost fell out of the bed at one stage. I dunno why she complains! She could have slept on the floor or on my bed...

I may need to persuade the Residence Manager to extend the house so that my Royal Corporealness can have a larger bed to rest in.

5 Jan 2024

Granddad has gone. Clearly this is due to the evil suitcases. Suitcases are the root of all evil. It means people are leaving!

Anyone who manufactures, distributes, or supports the use of these evil things shall be punished by severe nyanging to their treacherous hands.

The removal of suitcase temptation should ensure the movements of humans, both liked and disliked, are restricted to the whims of Her Majesty. That is a much better state of affairs.

26 Dec 2023

Granddad is here!

He materialized...just like that! I think Mum was involved somehow, but the important thing is... HE IS HERE!

29 Oct 2023

My Mother sometimes mocks my sleeping positions. She clearly does not appreciate my creative sleeping habits.

28 Oct 2023

Here is my impression of an upside-down snaggle-toothed snake-eyed vampire dog!

30 Sep 2023

My Mother abandoned me. Albeit at one of my Royal Residences. Fortunately my French house-mate was smart enough to be rapidly trained in servitude.

After about a week Mum returned. She had moved our house again!

Humans are weird.

12 Jun 2023

Humans say that even the darkest cloud has a silver lining.  I am thinking that the reverse is true.

So, being able to open the cupboard myself is a good thing. Mummy always told me to stay away from chocolate and I have  always listened to her. But it just smelled so good!

It was good, too. For a while. Then things went downhill.

I didn't feel very good.

I love my Mummy. She took me to the Nasty Vet, and I am OK now. I don't remember much. I think a labrador must have slipped something into the chocolate. But Queen Minkah is tough and her judgement can be brutal!

I am still a little woozy from the things the Nasty Vet gave me.All bacon donations will be stockpiled until I feel a little better.Please feel free to send bacon.

And nuggets.

For later.

When I return to my normal strength, I shall hunt down the labradors who tried to trick me with chocolate... they shall regret they were born!

I may also take a moment to bite the Nasty Vet. He made my mummy cry...

26 May 2023

Mummy found some pictures of me from my Royal Past. This one is when I was only 3, and I am with my Matron Dog. I miss her. 

And this is when I was just a baby!

I must say, I was very cute. And I have held up extremely well to the ravages of time.

20 May 2023

Why is there a Mars rover in my living room?

19 May 2023

I am experimenting with artistic and symmetrical arrangement of my toys. What do you think? I call this "Pachyderm Cross with Unicorn Crown".

29 April 2023

I have discovered that cottage cheese pleases me and I will start accepting gifts in the form of cottage cheese from today forward.

Preferably supplemented with bacon.

Or chicken nuggets.

Or salmon.

Or all of the above.

22 April 2023

I am learning how to become a people. Mummy lets me sit in her chair at the table and provides pats and hugs for my pleasure. I could get used to being a people. The only thing I can't figure out is, how do you lie down on these things?!

14 April 2023

It is with both pride and a heavy heart that I update you with some news.

The pride comes from the fact that as of today I have discovered how to open the lower cupboard in my primary Royal Residence. This enables me to treat myself to Schmackos whenever required!

However, it does mean that I am announcing the disbandonment of the Queen's Own Cupboard Opening Company. These human members of the OTR have served me well, but they are no longer required. I wish them well for their future.

12 March 2023

Easter is approaching. To celebrate, my Mum got me a bunny! I am now making sure that no-one dares to try to take it from me!

25 Feb 2023

My Mummy is very special. She somehow got me a T-Rex bone! And yes...it is ALL FOR ME!

23 Feb 2023

My Mummy got me a crocodile! It makes a nice change to disembowelling unicorns.

9 Feb 2023

Good news! I have trained the visiting Englishman to throw my Unicorn.

22 Jun 2025:  An awakening

So I had a strange feeling and woke up in a new place. Couldn't see very far, butmore distressingly, Mum was nowhere near. Then this figure appeared. It was more light than human, but somehow it seemed very old. I was suspicious, of course. But they did not seem too bad, I suppose. I asked where I was and they said a place called Heaven, because I was such a good dog. Patronising bastard! I started to dislike them.

I asked where Mum was and they said she is not here. I suggested she be brought to me and I was told this could not be done. Then they tried to pat me so I bit them. Ha! You should have seen the old bugger jump! I don't think anyone has bitten them for years!

They ran off somewhere. Probably to cry about the minor injury (I was not overly vicious - they were very old) Clearly a wimp. But I guess I showed them! They should think themselves lucky it was only a warning bite. Had I been serious, they would be missing a hand.

But as they left I saw this large throne that looked very comfy so I tried it out. It is just great! And now I can "see" (in some sense) Mum and all sorts of weird things.

Of course, the most important thing I must do is to ensure Mum's safety until we get together again. After some experimenting I believe I have found how I can influence the behaviour of people that I can see from my throne. So I suggested to Mum that she desperately needs another dog to protect her, until I can continue doing it. (I hope the old light-thing is looking into this...) I thought Mum should go to a Dog Rescue place and find a dog that is suitable and I suggested this to her, unconsciously, and it worked! I even picked the dog for her. A big and strong dogwho had been badly treated by her humans (Note to self: deal with them later!)

So Mum now has a dog called Vaila, a large guardian to do my job while we are separated. Vaila is strong and I believe she is capable of entrail removal, should the need arise.

I can also influence Vaila, and I have impressed upon her the importance of looking after Mum.

Now...I wonder what else I can do from this throne...which is, clearly, rightfully mine (at last!) Experimentation required!